Child custody arrangements can be managed without long court battles. With guidance from an experienced New York child custody mediator, parents can create a practical and fair plan using these four key steps:

Step 1: Select the Right Mediator and Attend Your Initial Meeting
Choosing the right mediator is essential. For example, if you and your co-parent have difficulty communicating, consider a mediator who has experience with high-conflict situations. During your first meeting, the mediator will explain the structure of future sessions and answer questions. For instance, if you’re worried about confidentiality, the mediator will clarify that discussions are private and can’t be used in court if mediation breaks down.

Step 2: Identify Key Custody Issues
Since each family’s circumstances are unique, you’ll need to discuss particular concerns, such as:

• Custody and Visitation Schedule: If one parent has a non-traditional work schedule, like rotating night shifts, the visitation plan may need to accommodate this.
• Special Circumstances: For holidays, consider traditions, such as if one parent always takes the child to see extended family for Thanksgiving.
• Logistics and Communication: If the parents live far apart, they might agree to use a shared digital calendar or app, like OurFamilyWizard, to coordinate schedules.
• Future Modifications: Establish a method for making changes. For example, parents may decide to review and adjust the agreement every two years or if one parent relocates for work.
• Family-Specific Concerns: You might discuss if a child should attend a religious summer camp annually or plan for emergency medical care, such as agreeing that the parent closest to the hospital will handle urgent medical visits.

Step 3: Negotiate and Reach Agreements
At this stage, being open to compromise is key. For example, if one parent wants more holiday time, they may offer flexibility for the other parent to take the child on an extended vacation during summer. The mediator will keep conversations focused on the child’s needs, preventing discussions from becoming arguments. If one parent insists on a rigid schedule, the mediator might suggest creative solutions, like swapping weekends as necessary.

Step 4: Finalize, Sign, and File the Agreement
Once all details are settled, the mediator will draft the custody agreement. Before signing, double-check that all stipulations are accurate. For instance, if you agreed to exchange the child at a neutral location like a local park, make sure it’s clearly stated in the document. Once signed, the agreement becomes a court-filed, legally binding contract. If a parent fails to follow it—such as refusing visitation—that parent could face legal consequences, like modified custody rights or fines.

Child custody mediation for New York families

At the Law Offices of Stacy Sabatini, Esq., we work hard utilizing our legal knowledge and negotiation skills to create successful child custody mediation agreements. If you would like to find out more about our mediation or other family law services and are a resident of either Rockland, Orange, or Westchester county, please contact our office online at www.sskfamilylaw.com or by email at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..">This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..